Tag Archives: screw the universe

Jersey Devil Press Loves You

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Mola Ram Loves You Too

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, and, while there’s always the chance everything will go fine and the night will end with you, your significant other, and an empty bottle of wine, it could also end with the violent shooting deaths of seven mobsters, or with you cooking dinner for your roommates, realizing halfway through that February 14th is important to some people and you probably should go see your girlfriend, shrugging it off, finishing dinner, and then going to see your girlfriend anyway and having to have one of those big, important, stupid relationship conversations at ten at night with little to no chance of that bottle of wine showing up. You know, hypothetically.

Our point is, while the world is terrifying and sometimes snorts when it laughs, there is one constant that you can grab onto: Jersey Devil Press loves you. Platonically, romantically, and sometimes we watch you with binoculars while you’re in the shower-ly.

That is why, on this wonderful day, we are giving you less than three (less than three = <3, get it?!) of our most romantic titles, filled with loving, longing, and boners. Between today, Wed. 13th, and Sun. 17th, you can get Danger_Slater's Love Me and Eirik Gumeny and Stephen Schwegler’s Screw the Universe for free for your Kindle. Two more perfect books about the search for love and sweet, sweet lovin’ there never were.

Look, we’re not saying you should steal your wife’s Kindle, download these books (and the .pdf of the February issue [which is actually about love {albeit the mutual masturabation to ducks kind}]) onto it, wrap it, and give it back to her in lieu of flowers and chocolates. We’re just saying that, if you do, we guarantee it will be a Valentine’s Day she never forgets.

Jersey Devil Press Embraces the Future While Still Lovingly Caressing the Past

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Next week — November 1 to be specific — the Amazon Kindle Top 100 Ranking e-book Screw the Universe will be released as a paperback, thus fulfilling the prophecy and making all Jersey Devil Press titles available to every reader everywhere, regardless of his (or her) format predilection. The discerning sci-fi comedy fan will now have her (or his) pick of both traditional print versions or new and shiny digital formats.

We here at JDP are major fans of e-books. But we also fully understand the desire to kill a bunch of trees and hold an actual, factual paperback in your hands. So we figured, why not do both? A great story is a great story, regardless of how you read it. So we’re going to get them out there in as many ways as we can.

In case you need reminding, Screw the Universe, by Stephen Schwegler and Eirik Gumeny, is currently available as an e-book through Smashwords and the Kindle Store. The paperback version is releasing Nov. 1 and will be available through Amazon.com and for distribution to brick-and-mortar stores.

And don’t forget all our other awesome Jersey Devil Press titles! Especially don’t forget the recently released Love Me, by Danger_Slater! Forget even one of them and we will hunt you down.

I Prefer Extortion – The X Makes It Sound Cool

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the world's most flammable novelAre you there, internet? It’s me, Eirik.

I know you’re busy, what with your terabytes of donkey porn and bad-mouthing one another anonymously and everything, but I have a favor to ask: I need your money.

$25 gets you a paperback of Love Me — early, before the common folk can lay their hands on it — plus an e-book of Screw the Universe by Stephen Schwegler and myself. We’ll probably throw in some magnets, too, because, hey, why not?

Now, I know some of you have your own books you’re raising money for *cough*Dick Cheney Saves Paris*cough* but we’re flexible. If you can’t donate $25, donate $10 or $4 or a quarter. Every little bit counts. Every five bucks is one more review copy, every forty cents is most of a stamp. And every donation, regardless of amount, gets a free e-book of Screw the Universe.

Ultimately, though, this is bigger than just Love Me, or me or Steve, or possibly even Danger, this is about Jersey Devil Press as a whole. Quite frankly, we can’t afford to produce another anthology right now — or another novel or short story collection — and I know a lot of you want us to. We want to, too. But unless you buy Danger’s book, or our other books, or just toss us a couple bucks, it’s not going to happen.

So help us help you help Danger help us help you help our next author. Donate to Jersey Devil Press today.